insecurities

They never go away. They exist all within us,

plaguing our mind, while shattering any glimpse of beauty before it has the ability to manifest. 

Like little black demons, they refuse to be un-heard, to be silenced.

On some days, they grow louder like thunder accompanied by lightning bolts, striking Our homes.

 On some days, they are so powerful, they seem to strike our hearts, 

causing them to shatter and break.

Causing them severe destruction. 

Their power; so strong, it mimics the ocean's waves during a storm.

Thrashing and slamming the ocean shore, demanding to be heard,

to be seen.

They create a dent so deep in the oceans sand that it remains for years to come.

And just when that dent starts to fill, the waves return.

Only this time, they are heavier than before.

Like monsters that hide under our beds, 

they love the dark

& come to us during our darkest times, refusing to sleep.

Rejecting hunger, they remain starving. 

They crave our tears and our sadness.

They despise the light and promise to never let it shine too bright.

Their enemy is security, and they will stop at nothing to ensure that it barely exists.

They suffocate it, removing every last ounce of air from it’s depths.

& despite our tireless attempts to remain happy with ourselves, they tug and tug at our emotions until they are back in their grip.

Like a vacuum sucking up anything in its path, they take hold of any morsel of hope, happiness, and strength they find and bury them into a hole so deep, so dark

that it often feels as if even the brightest star could not illuminate them. 

They grasp onto our hopes, our dreams, our thoughts,

& like leeches, sucking the blood of human flesh, 

they refuse to stop until they have sucked them all away.

They promise to create pain, to create hurt, to create sadness.

They promise to create ugly, unkind, hateful thoughts so heavy that they remain seated on our shoulders each day, weighing us down...

reminding us of their existence, of our “flaws,” 

aiding in our exhaustion, in our pain.

& although many, their promises are never empty. 

They infuse our thoughts, aiding in their very being. 

What we think is all because of them.

These little demons are attached to our thoughts,

And they create lies that we start to believe.